the next himalayas
2010-03-09 11:40 p.m.
i realize i run on a very short fuse nowadays.
it only takes a minor irritation to start me steaming away internally.
and today i actually quietly muttered the f word to myself before realizing what i did.
then i go home and think about it and wonder how it was i got so annoyed over such a small thing.
it must be the lack of sleep.
and there i was thinking i was superhuman already being able to not sleep day after day after day.
gaaaah.
with life so hectic now happy things suddenly seem to be very short-lived and annoying things everlasting.
like my results, which i eventually realized can be categorized as good.
it has only recently rly struck me how significant they are because over the past few months i have been so disconnected from academia that the whole thing suddenly took on a lot less meaning.
which was why i wasnt really as anxious about the results coming out as i should have been.
then even after i realized i did well what was SUPPOSED to be ecstatic joy became more of like, oh ok good now maybe my parents might stop harping at me for dancing so much.
and i still havent celebrated it properly yet.
i didnt rly know whether it was appropriate to ask ppl out because i wasnt sure if they were happy or sad (i dont think THEY were sure if they were happy or sad because we all sort of lack a yardstick when it comes to A level results) and, anyway, had to go to xen that night.
then movida on sunday was cancelled because, once again, i had to go to xen.
im not rly complaining because its for a good cause since we're actually training for something and not just bumming around but its just unfortunate how everything happens at the same time.
plus the bachata thing on top of that and my being completely clueless about partner dances - not just the variations but also the dynamics of working with a partner since i have, after all, only did choreos with brenda and dionne so far.
pfft.
and i thought that the craziness ends with a levels.
its more enjoyable craziness, that's for sure, but craziness all the same.
i just have to live through this and then i'd potentially have great success or have made a fool of myself.
well till then, taa!
