back to the past 2
2007-05-15 1:47 p.m.
i was going through my blog archives, reliving those weird old memories, when i chanced upon an old prank of mine which amused me to no end last year.
so here it is, people, what you saw a year ago and am about to see again now!
i realize im running out of names.
there're SO MANY.
to begin with there's fee fi fo fum (each an individual person) then there's shoes socks feet (EAIP) and the owls pigs furthers (an individual group each) then there're the more secured names like stripes and lipstick and elizabeth and faith or hope or something. oh and let's not forget dodo aka toothead aka potato.
there's also the banana, the baboon, the gross, the beggar, and the moo.
and THEN there came feathers and buffa and tarantula (now weedo) and toadstool and The Weirdo. a few days later puffy was introduced with fluffy and peesy at its heels.
im so out of names. the name fluffy was plucked out of thin air because i could think of nothing else. even peesy has a slight relevance to its subject-in-question.
sheesh.
anyway, today was officially buffa's fifteenth birthday, which was a disaster for us. we planned surprise after surprise, only to have them all busted wide open.
first we planned to have a sort of surprise party thing at her house in the evening. we tried to call her mom to have her grant consent, but everytime we called dionne picked up, and we had to make up some lame excuse for calling her. in the end when we had everything beautifully planned out, she told us that she would b going to her grandfather's house to celebrate.
there went a perfectly good surprise-could-be.
next we planned to have mysterious gifts sent to her. unfortunately our courier wasnt very reliable and must have leaked something out, the untrustworthy twit who couldnt follow instructions like: 'pass the gift to her. say its from somebody. dont say anything else.'
and our last and final puny surprise. we bought a cake for her and planned to surprise her with it during recess. unfortunately she showed up earlier than calculated.
it was all very head-knocking-ish.
and i just read some personal recounts from weedo and tan min's blog. i would like to say that all comments there are NOT TRUE, and would like to set the record straight here.
ok visualize this: a chair.
got that?
right. now imagine an armrest next to it. one whose lid can b flipped up and down.
understand?
moving on. now, visualize rows upon rows of such armrested-chairs.
now, imagine sitting behind one such chair.
you look at the armrest of the chair in front of you, and your shoe inches over to it.
the tip of your shoe touches the lid and flips it open, and you nonchalently start doing something else.
the person in front of you discovers an open armrest and spends some time puzzling over it, tapping his seatmate on the shoulder and gesturing towards the armrest with words like 'ghost' slipped into the conversation now and then.
its an addictive pastime.
now, imagine some ignorant toothead sitting in front of you who doesnt even notice when BOTH of his armrests are flung up.
that would b peesy.
now for the really challenging bit.
visualize a weedo and a tan min sitting next to you, continuously flicking the armrest back down.
imagine some feathers getting really pissed off over this and flipping it back up again.
imagine a subtle, not-so-silent fight going on over the armrest, with the victim sitting just a few inches in front.
now, imagine you are peesy.
your armrest is being continuosly flicked up and down. there are muffled shrieks and scuffles going on just a few inches behind you. now, imagine NOT BEING AWARE OF ANY OF THIS.
THAT is an example of a REAL toothead.
how ignorant can one get?! to not notice one's chair getting kicked and shoved and one's armrest getting flung up and down and up again. not to mention the hysterical laughter and the aforementioned muffled shrieks.
sheesh.
well i bypart this precious bit of prankalogy to everyone (but only because weedo and tan min gave it away in their blogs already). its a really fun thing to do in the auditorium when some stuffy old teacher is giving some talk about volunteerism.
another fun thing to do would b do imagine all the words 'volunteer' to become 'terrorize'.
so on the slide show were words like 'what is terrorism? who is a terrorist? why should i b a terrorist? what do i get out of terrorism?' its very, very funny.
well i have distributed enough wisdom. TTFN.
toothead used to be my favourite word.
here's another, from a PE lesson a year ago.
then we had pe. the demented teacher got us to jog 4 rounds around the school. what use is that? it wasnt even interesting. now if we were going OUT of school it would have been more fun but to just circle the school 4 times like depressed hamsters is just stupid.
it was kind of funny seeing zhuqing running. sort of like seeing a rabbit crabwalking. it just didnt look RIGHT, in a sense.
that is why she is weedo!
yes i know you're getting tired of this incredibly lengthy post. but who cares? i shall continue pasting more.
after a while i went to the toilet, and in the midst of washing my hands heard a great commotion gg on outside. i calmly walked out and saw:
-yz screaming and laughing and trying to tug away from
-tan min and zhuqing who were gripping her hands and trying to type at the same time
-an msn conversation on the computer screen
so i walked towards the bunch of weirdos and soon understood the situation.
apparently yz had insulted some guy in tan min's contact list, using tan min's msn account. so tan min leapt to her own defense and tried to type yz's name and of course yz tried to push her away and zhuqing joined in and a scuffle broke out.
they were typing stuff like 'yzhg' 'yufh'.
so, to put a stop to the squabble, i calmly typed in 'yuzhu'.
but did the chaos ease? noooo. yz quickly retaliates by typing MY name.
and then the scuffle broke out again, with me included this time.
tsktsk. i forgot how it all ended in the end.
kinda anti-climactic isnt it?
and here is another one!
the little X on your window is there for a reason.
there're rats living on the first floor of my condo.
things are really hectic down there, what with that sly old cat and now this rat. amazing they dont bump into each other, but keep appearing in front of my dogs. maybe they have some sort of pact going on between them.
ive seen the rat quite a few times. i'd exit the lift and see 2 little paws and a long tail whip out of sight around a corner, with my dogs barking the roof down next to me.
my presence never goes unannounced.
then we walk on, and see that stupid smug cat. it doesnt really slink around corners or things like that, oh no. this cat struts proudly on the pathway, bold as brass, like it owns the whole place. you'd think its just another resident, taking an evening stroll, then you notice the small size and the tail.
and of course the most annoying thing is its CONCEIT. its so smart it knows the dogs are on a leash and cant go wild on it, so it sits and watches us. if we get too close it hisses and does its fur thing and my dogs back off but continue to bark, at a safe distance. so the only thing i, the only intelligent homo sapien, can do is admit defeat and drag the dogs away. very in-dignifying.
someday i'd catch that cat.
i never did.
if you're still here reading, good for you, you know how to appreciate my ingenius writing.
so i shall fulfil that need within you to read more great literary works.
today.
dionne and i tried the sweep the money off the wishing wall again, and managed to shift a five-cent coin say, 2 inches.
but half of the pen that was tied on the end of the string was left on the wall and had to b knocked off with great difficulty in the end.
oh well, its progress.
tomorrow, with some new additions by jun hui, we shall try yet again.
during english we had some weird worksheet where we were supposed to draw out faces according to the expression given.
like nonchalant, exhausted, depressed, etc.
most people's drawings looked more like retarded, possessed, constipated, etc.
in between lessons yz and i walked out to get a drink and loitered at the cooler for a while because the teacher was obviously not in class yet. whilst looking downstairs we decided to identify the body parts sticking out from between the railing downstairs.
so we called out names like elbow, shin, foot, arm, hand, and suddenly, FACE.
it was so creepy. apparently we were chanting loud enough for the sources of the body parts to hear and their heads popped up from downstairs to stare at us.
haha imagine their bewilderment. they were innocently standing at the railing when voices floated down, saying elbow, shin, foot, arm, hand, etc. and they look outwards and see one of the aforementioned part of themselves sticking out over the railing.
must have been weird.
it was indeed.
but what's a great post without a great finish? here's something that really reflects our top 4 most-blogged-about (tan min zhuqing yuzhu dionne)'s standard operating mode.
then we played freeze and melt which was very stupid. zhuqing stood at one spot without moving at all, constantly getting frozen and unfrozen but not making a difference really, whilst tan min stayed with her, only moving a few inches occasionally. dionne SCREAMED and screamed whenever the freezer was even remotely close to her, but it always helped her escape because the person would b too breathless with laughter to chase.
yz as the freezer guarded dionne infinitely when she FINALLY caught someone because, i think, it was really hard-won. it was quite funny, really. she was darting back and forth around dionne like a mother hen, chasing us away. really weird, the bunch of us must have looked.
then lessons, blahblahblah. during lunch dionne left for her exam and yz and i tried to fish money off the wall again, but this time, the string broke and the pens dropped down, arghh. this thing is never going to work.
till today that wall with its alluring money stands, mocking us.
yes i know i said that was the ending already but things such as sequels exist for a reason!
well. pepsi with agressive, scream-prone ppl like dionne and yz, AND weirdos like jun hui and kejun, definitely is competitive. dionne apparently has this screaming reflex that kicks in whenever she gets terrified, or freaked, or adrenaline-rushed in anyway. and yz has a tendency to RUSH out at however threatens her. not a very good technic in pepsi. junhui just swoops in suddenly when you least expect it and kejun's attempts to back off has him in ridiculous poses.
only tan min and i were mostly normal. tsk.
when we finally ended we were hot and sweaty and uncomfortable but yz still wanted to play freeze and melt. and so we did, in the very very limited space further obstacled by this disgusting mud puddle.
it was really really dumb. 6 ppl running around trying to catch each other in a small space filled with hurdles like bars and mud puddles, (dionne) screaming all the way.
yes we do that a lot.
and with that, i finally end this novel.
